… the top drawer of your cabinet is bursting with replacement corks.
… you are hoarding plastic pipettes.
… you refuse to eat caramel ice cream.
… you melanchollically remember the time when you had only 20 open bottles.
… you realize that to stop buying new bottles is as easy as quitting smoking.
… you hope your family won’t give you whisky for Christmas because they think you’ll love the Lidl special.
… you can type “Laphroaig” on the keyboard without looking.
… you know the founding years of your favourite distilleries by heart but have to look up the birth years of your parents.
… you are surprised to learn that Ben Wyvis is a mountain in Scotland.
… you tell your daughter she cannot have a white horse while you have daydreams of a white horse picking you up and carrying you to Lagavulin.
… you begin to wonder if you will ever be able to taste all those samples.
… you are absolutely sure you will need all those emtpy sample bottles again some time.
… you have trouble to find a free slot for holidays in your calendar in between all the whisky events you need to attend.
… you are particularly friendly to women named Ellen.
… you cannot eat chocolate or cheese without thinking what whisky might go best with it.
… you take tasting notes for the whisky fudge you just bought.
… you take your Glencairn to work, just in case.
… there is no ice cube tray in your freezer.
… you have visited more distilleries than relatives.
… simple words like “malt” and “mill” induce salivation and make your heart beat faster.