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Buy The Dalmore Oligarch Collection – Help A Billionaire In Need — Dramming
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Buy The Dalmore Oligarch Collection – Help A Billionaire In Need

by Oliver Klimek on May 2, 2012

Hikers beware! Twenty-one rabid stags are on the loose in the Scottish Highlands. The gang have named themselves Constellation Collection and they are after uber-rich oligarchs in particular. There are reports that the herd is bound for World Duty Free at London Heathrow Terminal 5, but it cannot be ruled out that they will continue to make their havoc-wreaking way to other airports around the world with Singapore Changi Airport being regarded as the most likely target for their next assault. Too close a contact with the stag carries the imminent risk of a cash drain of £2000 at the very least, the maximum risk is said to be £158,000 if you get bitten by all of them, but this figure may not be the end of the story.

Just kidding. Yesterday I received the exciting news that Dalmore has launched what may be the grandest charity effort in the history of Scotch whisky. Poor billionaire Vijay Mallya from India who happens to own Dalmore by owning Whyte & Mackay by owning the UB Group is having a very hard time right now. Some of his investments like Kingfisher Airlines or aforementioned Whyte & Mackay have been causing him a lot of headaches lately, so W&M management have decided to give his ailing wallet a little relief.

This set of 21 bottles will set a new standard in whisky charity. Unlike Macallan wasting the proceeds of their Cire Perdue whisky on water – even in Mallya’s home country India! – or Glenfiddich burying the money in the eternal ice of the Himalayas, Dalmore gives charity a face!

Please go out and buy these bottles to help this man in need! In a country where the annual average income per capita is only about £600, every quid can make a difference!

Vijay Mallya picture via Wikipedia

{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }

Tim Read May 2, 2012 at 10:09 pm

It’s a real tough time for the 1%. Even their 20 year old whiskies cost £2000 – if only they knew how to manage their money better! I could find two bottles for them for £2000!

Please, oligarchs, contact me, and I will DOUBLE the amount of bottles you get for your £2000!


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